Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Spicy Oats Take One

I knew work was going to be a hot mess today, so I decided to kick off my morning with a little hot and spicy mess of my own to make me feel better. Here is my own (slightly misguided) version of the supah spicy oats, which I’ve been dying to try. I didn't want to cook an egg ( mistake #1), so I used my fave protein substitute: cottage cheese, and mixed it with some Greek yogurt. I actually made them into overnight oats (mistake #2), since I was going to be rushed. And instead of using just oats, I added some Fiber One, which was more out of habit than anything (mistake #3).
So here's probably what NOT to mix together:
  • ½ c. cottage cheese
  • 1/3 c. oats
  • ¼ c. fiber one
  • ridic Frank’s sauce
  • s&p
I topped my bungled bowl with couple of squirts of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Spray (just for you Allison, even though I can't follow your recipe), and then also added some salted peanuts (I figured, what the hell?) to up the savory quality. Ok, I'm not saying this turned out awful--I still ate it. But here's my valuable learning experience:
  • Don't use Fiber One. That was silly. I kept tricking myself into thinking I was eating something sweet since the cereal has my good friend aspartame in there. So I'd take a bite, chew, chew, chew and then get hit with the salt and spice from the back. It was confusing for my mouth.
  • This needs to be warm. I think I could get behind the savory a little more if it wasn't cold. I'm sure everyone already knows this.
  • Try an egg for Pete's sake like you're supposed to.
Hopefully one of the things you guys like about this blog is that I post my experiments even when they come out kind of yuckier than I anticipated. Most people just wonder what stuff tastes like in odd combination. I actually try it. I don't know what this says about me good, bad or indifferent.

My apologies to the lovely Allison for massacring her masterpiece. So sorry! But don't worry my little green puppy pants, I promise a repeat with more of the original oaty ingredients quite soon.


  1. you had me cracking up! i think i like the epic failure post better than if it were a success. BUT you do need to make her recipe, the spicy oats are so dang good! i also add a wedge of laughing cow light to make it super creamy :) xo

  2. I've always been a sweet oats kinda girl, but that's mostly because I've never tried spicy oats...you are hilarious, btw!

  3. LOL - I'm rolling on the floor laughing right now! You actually did the spicy oats justice because you made them your own - and really tried to make them work :) I have faith you can redeem yourself :)

  4. Interesting...I never thought to make SPICY oats! HA This was a fun read!

  5. Haha, this post made me laugh! I'm so sorry your spicy oats weren't up to par - they are bueno though so I hope you try them again :)

  6. I think it's cool you tried your own version of them. Sorry they didn't turn out, but hey, that's part of the trying-out process, right?